When People are Big and God is Small

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I chose this particular book for this month’s article not necessarily for it’s amazing content, but specifically for the topic it covers and the type of book that it is. Let me explain. I want to expose our church to the realm of what is called Biblical Counseling. Simply stated, Biblical Counseling is the use of God’s Word, by the power of the Holy Spirit, to diagnose and provide a solution to desires, thoughts, and behaviors that need to change to become more conformed to God’s will. Basically, it is turning to the Scripture to find answers to most of life’s problems.

            We turn to the Scripture because it alone is completely sufficient to provide us with ‘everything pertaining to life and godliness’ (2 Pet 1:3). The Bible declares about itself that it can ‘pierce us to the division of soul and spirit, joints and marrow and is able to judge the thoughts and intentions of the heart’ (Heb 4:12). No other resource or book can speak with absolute authority like the Bible because it is communicated to us directly from God Almighty (2 Tim 3:16-17).

            The title of the book I am recommending this month is When People are Big and God is Small. The subtitle reads: Overcoming Peer Pressure, Codependency, and the Fear of Man. You see the focus of this book is to look carefully at what the Bible says about things like peer pressure and issues like it and then provide Biblical solutions to that problem. The Bible does not use the phrase ‘peer pressure,’ but that doesn’t mean the Bible doesn’t address this issue. The Bible describes something else called the ‘fear of man’ that is inherently the same problem. The author says that the fear of man is “being afraid of someone, but it extends to holding someone in awe, being controlled or mastered by people, worshipping other people, putting your trust in people, or needing people.” Basically, it is replacing God with people. Instead of holding God in high esteem, we hold people and their opinions of us in high esteem.

            If you were to turn to the world about this problem you would probably hear it called something like peer pressure, or being a people pleaser, or having codependency issues. But the Bible does not see these things as mental illnesses or disorders, but as spiritual issues. With a good understanding of what the Bible says, coupled with the consistent application of the principles the Bible says to put into practice, it can help us overcome these various problems. That is the power and the sufficiency of the Scripture.

            We have to be careful turning to the world for solutions to behavioral and social problems. Now, I’m not talking about physical or biological problems like birth defects or mental disabilities. That is a completely other discussion. I am confident however, that the Bible tells us how to consistently live pleasing to the Lord despite the physical problem. But here I’m referring specifically to what the world would call ‘disorders’ that are not inherently biologically based. Like, for example, things like codependency, worry, addiction, self-esteem, and other similar issues.

            The problem with turning to the world for answers is 3fold. First, the world and its psychologies do not begin with an accurate view of man. They begin with the starting point that man is inherently good and when that person does something wrong, a malfunction must be present. The Bible says man is inherently sinful and so doing bad things is part of his nature. Second, the world promotes the improvement of self above all; that our own well-being is of most importance. The Bible says pleasing God is of most importance, and that our well-being should come second to Him. Third, the world advocates a ‘victim mentality’ which tells us something outside of us happened to us to cause us to be this way. The Bible says it is out of the heart that comes wrongful thoughts and attitudes (Mark 7:21). With this in mind we must turn to Scripture for answers first.

            Now, there is much more that can be said about this issue, but I encourage you check out the Christian books on these types of topics. Do you struggle with something like peer pressure? Then read this book. Do you struggle with fear, worry, and anxiety? There are books on that (Running Scared by Edward T. Welch). Do you have a problem with self-esteem? There are books to help us with that (The Biblical View of Self-Esteem, Self-Love, and Self-Image by Jay Adams). There are books on addictions, helping our children with things like ADHD, and many more. I have little booklets on things like anxiety, loneliness, depression, time management, stress, anger, etc. All of which use the Scripture to address the problem and provide a solution. Why not see how the Scripture can help before turning to the world?